All Your Houseguests Are Belong to Us!




Thursday, July 21, 2005

TUNA NEWS -- JULY 21, 2005

It's eviction day in the BB house, and Michael, well, thanks for the drama. Once the votes were cast yesterday the plotting began in earnest for the upcoming week. Who said what?

THIS IS NOT ABOUT BEAU
Eric: Did the fairy cleaning people come last night?
Eric woke up to find a spotless house that Kaysar and Howie cleaned the night before. Rachel wonders if there was maid service. When the girls compliment Howie on the spotless house, Howie gives credit to Kaysar, saying he lives in a palace and has lots of maids. Howie says Kaysar picked up his spotless cleaning habits by watching them.

SPEAKING OF CLEANING
Jennifer admits to James that she is "not a big fan" of the Gold Room (where Michael, Janelle, Kaysar and Howie tend to hang out). Jennifer says, "It's so sad. It's tainted now." James tells her "We will wash everything down."

AND A BIT OF SWEEPING
Kaysar speaks to Eric about the vote, telling him it "won't be a sweep." Kaysar says, "I don't think anyone should be swept. It's a hurtful feeling, and that's all I'm going to say."

LEADING BY UNDERSTANDING
Eric admits to Rachel that he's surprised about his friendship with Beau. He says he never expected he could be friends with "someone like Beau" (GAY!!) and how he was able to come into the house and put all his differences and opinions aside (except when he can't put all his differences and opinions asides and lets his fists do the talking). Eric says he has actually come to like Beau as a friend. Kum-ba-Yah!

LEADING BY LYING
The Hamsters get their booze. Eric, the upstanding lead-by-example leader that he is wasn't going to tell "the outcasts" (Michael and Janelle, specifically, since Kaysar doesn't drink). BB called him and said he had to tell them.

WAS THAT PART OF THE FOOD COMPETITION?
Rachel says her breakfast tastes like an elephant ear.

ASTUTE OBSERVATIONS
Kaysar: (on eyebrow plucking) "After the redness goes away...and the bleeding stops, it will look great!"
April: "They've got new fish!"
Sarah: Look at the fish! Howie: Look at the fish's boobies!

CAN YOU KEEP A SECRET?
If you're April, the answer is no. She tells the entire Lemming Alliance up in the HoH room that she and Jennifer were in the same sorority.

LEST YOU THINK HOWIE IS SO DUMB - TAKE 1
Howie whispers to Rachel (his secret partner) and tells her, "It doesn't matter who are couples, it matters who is strong. James is the strongest player in this game. We've got to get him out of here. Once James is gone, there is nothing to stop us. It makes it that much easier. The people power, they are not strong competitors -- they just have vote power.

LEST YOU THINK HOWIE IS SO DUMB - TAKE 2
After Janelle and Michael and Kaysar admit and name their secret partners, they approach Howie. Janelle asks Howie over and over and over again if he knows anybody in the house.
Janelle: Howie, do you know anyone in this house?
Howie: You guys.
Janelle: I meant, did you know anyone before you came here?
Howie: I've seen Ashlea in Florida. I recognize her boobies!
Janelle: Have you been offered extra money to bring anyone in the house?
Howie: I'm sorry I have to tell you ..... NO!
Janelle: Are you sure?
Howie: I think so. I'm supposed to know someone? Like is someone my step-sister or something?

LEST YOU THINK HOWIE IS SO DUMB - TAKE 3
Howie tells Kaysar it doesn't make sense to put up both April and Jennifer. He says nobody would care. Howie tells him to put one person from two different pairings up to break everything wide open. Kaysar asks about the logic of putting up Eric and James. Howie says it's good, because they can't defend each other at the competition. Howie tells Kaysar, "Janelle is tough. You underestimate her...." Kaysar replies, "Why do you think I have her close to me?"

LEST YOU THINK HOWIE IS SO DUMB - TAKE 4
Howie explains his feelings of uneasiness in the house. Howie says, "I asked them (the Lemming alliance) if I am ok, and they said 'you're OK for a couple of weeks.' So am I going to wait a couple of weeks to worry about it? I'm like, 'yeah, you guys got a couple weeks...till tomorrow!"

STRATEGERIE - HOWIE STYLE
Janelle: All the girls are uncomfortable with me except for Rachel.
Kaysar: ...Because they have guilty consciences.
Howie: They judge you because of your boobies.
Kaysar: We are trying to have a serious conversation and you keep chiming in with boobies.
Howie: That's why they hate you! Your boobies!

Janelle: I can't believe April and Jennifer know each other! They're so annoying.
Howie: Do you think they're lesbos?

FINAL THOUGHTS
Jennifer: I had a dream that I signed up for the farting competition!
Howie: (To Eric) How many kids can say their dad got into a fight on national TV?
Howie: There's doctors, lawyers, and perverts. And then there's fat asses and I'm one of them!
Janelle: Howie, we are friends. I don't think we'll ever be lovers. Howie: Not even for 30 seconds??

Comments on "TUNA NEWS -- JULY 21, 2005"

 

Blogger nlk said ... (7:02 PM) : 

*sniff*

sweet, sweet hamster crack.

 

post a comment